My adventures & misadventures in parenting & life.

Thursday, 27 March 2008

Eye see pain!

I can't believe I'm blogging this so let's just never discuss the icky bits again okgoodbyenow

I've had terrible diarrhoea today, the type that is pure liquid and that you can't hold in no matter what.
I've had this for a couple of days now along with heartburn & a spot blazing like a belisha beacon right on the edge of my nostril.

you can see why my fella stays with me it's my sexyness and attractiveness obviously. What do you mean? No? Why not? lol!

Well, on about my eleventy-hundredth trip to the loo I not quite make it to the loo which is degrading and bad enough but I also.............

let's not mention the fact I didn't make it ever again please? Pretty please? Pretty please with sugar on top?

Somehow I either stood up and fell or I blacked out and fell, I have no memory of it at all but I was on the ground with blood gushing out my eye.
It looks like I may have hit the bathroom door with my eye.
Blood was gushing everywhere but on the plus side I'd stopped pooing.
Yay me

Robin heard the thud / crash / deafening bump and came racing up the stairs to the loo only to find me sprawled on the floor wearing soiled pants around my ankles and gushing blood out of my eye

it's never, ever boring living with me I tell ya!

So we both get me cleaned up and stop the gushing, geyser that is currently my eye.
This involves lot's of cold water, pressure and the headache from hell (the kind of headache that Britney would be if she was spokeswoman for La Senza or Prozac).

I've been fine since no toilet stops or slips / blackouts. No double vision, just a mega headache that runs from my eyebrow to my jaw.

I could have fun with this black eye though. My fella is tall and broad and I'm sure people will think he did it but it's not something to play on. It happens to too many women daily for me to ever make fun of domestic violence. So, I'll tell the truth (minus the poop bit obviously) and lap up and sympathy I can get.

Sympathy can be donated in the form of cold, hard cash by phoning 0987givemeall.
All donations gratefully accepted, none refused.

AND how was YOUR day?

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