My Secret, Dirty Confession.

I'm admitting a secret here, something that at my age (in my 30's that's all I'm going to admit to!) is really quite sordid but I can't help myself.

It's not some serious, health risking or illegal activity type of secret here, I'm not a secret bullimic, anorexic, drug user or shop lifter and it's nothing that would worry or cause harm to anyone (Hubby, you can relax now lol). My secret is something that I wouldn't even be ashamed of if I was say twenty years younger. But. I'm an adult, a grown up (allegedly) and this vice should never even had entered my mind but it has. I'm firmly entrenched in this obsession. I scour internet sites and blogs on the subject. Hell, it's even on my desktop screen now.

What is my secret?

I'm addicted to watching the teen drama "Gossip Girl" and yes I know that's bad but that's not the worst of it. Not only do I watch each episode and replay I can I'm also madly in lust / admiration of the evil-doing of one of the characters.

I used to like Serena, the rich girl who was a nice girl, unaffected by money or status and her boyfriend Dan, the poor one (who still has more money than I've ever had) and is really moralistic. Then there's Little J, the wannabe who is meant to be naive but is really a manipulative, materialistic little witch in sheeps clothing.

Over the run of this series I've gone off these characters, I still like them and am addicted to their intruigues but I much prefer the evilness and manipulative powers of Blair and Chuck.

Blair, the richest one of all, the one who wears the most amazing clothes, has more servents than the entire Saudi Royal family yet is really just a girl who needs to be loved and is vulnerable in her needyness. I love her character, the way she plots, plans and schemes. I find myself willing her to win but I'm torn when she takes on Chuck because..........................................

I also want Chuck to win. I want him to be even more manipulative and evil. I want him and Blair to end up together ruining and destroying all who cross their way. I want to see a new show starring these two and how they destroy everyone who stands in their way. They would be the anti-heroes, the ones you shouldn't like but instead of hating or despising you find yourself egging them on to ever more nasty, evil acts.

My confession is that I am addicted to Chuck Bass, I love the way that under his evilness he's really a great guy who is just misunderstood and just wants to be loved for him and wants the respect of his father. He's meant to be a student at a private school so I guess I could be old enough to be his mum, it's not inconceivable, I would have had to given birth at fourteen but that's not unusual nowadays.

So I guess I'm lusting over a guy young enough to be my son!!!

Oh the shame!